Tuesday, March 13, 2012
It's been a year to date....since I've written here. Should I go back? Or start here..I'm too tired to go back, but the stories are so incredible you can't thank God properly without going back. HOWEVER..I'm not going back today.
I miss writing, it has been a long time since I shared my true feelings, I am often afraid. There are "things" I feel best left not shared, i just tell God, He reassures me. Over the last three years I've had to sensor my feeling and my thoughts before I spew them out, some of that is a good thing, some of it hurts.
Let me begin with the JOY of walking in obedience, being patient, waiting on God to deliver THE Dream in HIS timing, it feels long, but looking back it is pretty snappy. We finally bought our first Ministry Home, we are taking another step out in faith b/c it is SOOOO BIG, 2600 sq feet, five bedrooms, and we didn't have an inspection, (It wouldn't have mattered) so we unknowingly bought a home with a built in pool..inside. The entire house leaks..and you know I embellish for a good story but this time it's true. The kitchen pipes leak the supply lines leak, BROKEN leak...NOT just leak BROKE! But still I marvel at the house HUM has purchased. I see it with 7 guys in it, in recovery, from addiction, so far God isn't seeing it that way(the neighbor doesn't want us there either..poor thing). But we have some time to wait to see if HE wants what we want.
The beauty of this house and all it's rehab is that it has allowed us such great opportunities with Disciple Now Kids from New Hanover Presbyterian Church, Disciple Now Youth from Glen Allen Baptist, the kids are amazing creatures wanting to be part of THE change! One child ask me "are HOBOS living her?" Awe poor darlin'..this is good for you to come, there are no such things as HOBOS....what are they talking about at his home? Another child says. "I didn't realize people lived in places like this?" Yikes..I love this house, 1910, reminds me of my grandmother's farm house....Really high ceilings, porch on the front, I imagine swinging out there with my buds....a back yard that is filled with a beautiful birch tree....lots of shade, maybe a place for horse shoes? These are my dreams for my guys. A safe place, nice home, we are currently gutting the entire kitchen, gutting entire bathrooms, painting the entire house, two new windows.....My plumber says "You know this is a rental right?" I said "I do know that, but do you know i think these guys deserve what i deserve?" God says so..so I want it to be nice, maybe I'm naive, he thinks so. The beauty of my friends..they are now WORKING for the ministry, getting paid wages respectful of men, still NOT what they are worth, but not $7.25 an hour either at 58 years of age.
My plumber friend "Darryl" says.."Ms. Cassie...you've got to be careful hiring guys from the city...I said "Thank you Darryl", "I have been praying for these guys for three years." God has finally answered our prayers, and so far, He is sending us Honorable men. We trust Him. We meet our guys between 2008-2012, at the FreeMarket, a place that hasn't always been fun, but it a place where God tells me to meet my friends. I am comfortable there, it's like home. I notice others who come and run..they seem uncomfortable. I wonder why. I do understand it though..it's so good to stretch your faithful muscles.
I love when my friend Wally comes and sings, like he is in a Pub, my friends are so happy to see Wally...He is a beautiful man. He shares his gift with all of us, and he is so kind. he says..."so many want to learn to play the guitar?" OH I say..."maybe you should teach them?"
So while i was rushing God to hurry up and get us "THERE" He was helping me to build perfect relationships with friends who I now trust, and they trust me. They know i will pay them, they know I will bring them lunch sometimes. I listen...and actually they ask about my children. There are goats, but God told me there would be. The goats do not enter the gate.
The journey is getting close to changing, I feel it, so many community workers who come and help out, but not always with good intentions...i don't like that part...God will fix it. I trust him, every time someone complains, i remind them..God is going to fix IT. No matter what it is. This is not me, I'm a runner, i leave and go when i don't like something...this time i was asked to stay..only by the whispers of God. "Stay focused Cassie...Stay focused" I will prevail.(God) It's been an amazing ride to get here..and guess what...we are headed up the first hill on the Rebel Yell..seems like the ride might be WILD!
For your support and constant prayers, and for loving my friends, and for new friends, for VCU students and NorthMinster and Atlee.....I give thanks and God all the Glory! I Am so GRATEFUL....EVERYDAY!